In a society that often immortalizes sports stars, it is quite common to hear die-hard fans praising some specific skill or skill set associated with their team’s star athlete.  Whether its praise of the 4.3 forty time displayed by their team’s #1 draft pick at some meaningless combine, or the legend of Michael Jordan’s large hands, fans spend countless hours dissecting the physical and mental attributes of the game’s biggest stars.  From raves about vertical jumping ability or “soft” pass-catching hands, to jealous jabs about ball-handling skills and bat-speed, athletes are often the object of our praise.

For spending so much time talking about the biceps, abs and calf muscles of our athletes, its amazing that not much time is spent talking about the single most important attribute for men in choosing their mate…..physical looks.  Athletes are dissected and analyzed down to the most minuscule details, but we often pay little attention to their overall looks.  Well no more we say as we set out to anoint the ugliest athletes of our day.  There have been some doozies in the past, Dennis Rodman and his cross-dressing displays and A.C. Green’s ridiculous jheri curl come to mind.  In order to keep the article relevant, however, we’ve narrowed down our discussion to modern day athletes that are still lacing them up.

And, with the number one pick in the competition, the winner of this top 5 ugliest athlete contest goes to:

#1. Greg Oden.  The number one overall pick in the 2007 NBA draft has yet to display as much skill on the court as he displays ugly on the cover of sports magazines.  Mr. Oden proudly claims the number one slot on our list of ugliest athletes.

#2. Randy Johnson.  The man who failed in his attempt to revolutionize the mullet, Randy Johnson hits #2 on our list.  Johnson, known for his blazing fastball is rapidly approaching his 300th major league win…..which will give him one win for every acne scar on his lovable face.

#3.  Sam Cassell.  Often referred to as “the Alien,” the only uglier thing on Sam than his trash-talking mouth is his ridiculous dome.  At one point, Sam and #4 Ugliest Athlete selection Chris Kaman helped the Clippers put fear into the league for the first time in that franchise’s history…and no, it wasn’t because the team was a threat to win the game.

#4.  Chris Kaman.  Proudly dons the name “the Caveman,” Kaman has the straw thin long hair and asymmetric face to be number one on almost any Ugliest Athlete list.  We gave him a slide down to number four on this list because he’s been injured a lot over the past two seasons.  Another healthy season should help his stock rise to the top of our list.

#5. Ronaldino.  This guy is a soccer player so most sports fans in the United States wouldn’t even know who he was but for his horse-face and ESPN’s below the fold coverage of the World Cup a few years back.  Unfairly complimented as resembling Jar Jar Binks……..me thinks Jar Jar bes better looking yes yes.

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